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A Sense of Love

What love feels like to me is a leap in my chest.  It feels like tension.  A gentle pulling from opposite sides of my body.  Like a rubber band slowly stretching and releasing, my heart beats.  It feels like something I should act on, but instead must hold.  Just hold inside and feel.  Feel.  Feel.  Feel the tension.  Don't do anything.  Just feel.

To me, love tastes like a surprise.  The flavors are unfamiliar, deeply satisfying and full of delight.  I slowly savor while hoping I can binge forever.  Both are true.  Everything is true.  I want it all.

What love looks like to me is madness.  Like my mind has melted into an unrecognizable mush and is misfiring left and right.  Rationality, order, logic- nowhere to be found.  Pop!  Bang!  Crack!  The embers look dangerous.  The sparks are hot.

To me, love smells like my grandma's sweater.  The smell enters my body as air; and exits as water down my cheeks.  The fragrance of love releases a rush of chemicals.  My husband's neck.  Her oils.  Grandma's sweater.  My heart flutters instantly.  Love.

What love sounds like to me is my children gently teaching each other.  It sounds like Rowan singing.  It sounds like Darin's guitar.  Love sounds like lyrics that say things we can't.  To me, love sounds like silence.

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